Oooh aaargh, started drinking at 6 yesterday evening & didn’t stop until maybe 6 this morning. Yikes! Went home with the last guy who bought me a drink…had him on the tequila & Redbull too…what was I not thinking? He was way too old for me, must have been at least my age & suited to boot. Yuk! He tried to take full advantage of me back at his place, me effing & blinding all the way, before he passed out safely in his bed & left me to slumber on his couch. I woke up to his hard cock throbbing against my thighs. Would ya get out & walk!
So I got out & walked…right across the road to the bus stop. A fine sunny morning by the sea in Clontarf. And me in an absolute heap. In tatters!
Queen Anto was hilarious last night…all dressed in drag, tripping all over the shop in his platform shoes. He went flying down the stairs head over heels at one point! I thought he was a goner but no, he was grand. Made of rubber!
Anto & Bernard have decided they’re tying the knot. And I’m to be maid of honour. Gonna be some hooley for one hooley!
Didn’t mean to get oh so hammered last night, it just happened. I spent the first 2 hours slowly sipping espresso martinis waiting to hear from Bernard. When there was no word from him, I made other plans. Found a handsome & horny wee devil on Tinder & he joined me when he couldn’t persuade me to meet at his place nearby. He was wondering if I’d like to come over & check out his 9 inches!
After a couple of drinks we headed back to his place & hit the ganja. Man, I got toasted! I was much too much for my host, laughing my head off like a crazy hyena. Stoned as a coot. He was terrified I’d rattle the neighbours so he took me for a walk & legged it at the first available opportunity, leaving me free to catch up with Bernard & Anto at last.
By then it was about midnight & the boys had already been about the town & were holed up in their hotel room, beyond inebriated. The bar was hopping downstairs so Anto & I hopped downstairs & that was as far as we got. I made it my duty to molest every last man in the bar…by the buns or by the balls. They were loving it. And my battle cry. Me too! Me too!
Ugh, he had his fingers inside me. Grrross. Which is why I’m never getting hammered again. Mr Suit was taking full advantage of my gee-eyed state by taking me home & trying to bang me, motherfucker. Rule of thumb: avoid getting drunk unless in safe hands.
Still we had a right laugh riding about town on a rickshaw before I made the monstrous mistake of hopping in a cab home with him. Was very very drunk & disorderly of me. I’d almost rather get arrested than wake up in that motherfucker’s place. Fuck! I roared as soon as I woke. Curled up alone on his couch. Wasn’t long before he was beside me, poking my thighs with his hard cock. Good moaning in the morning, yuck!
Fuck off! I bellowed, bouncing to the far end of the couch. He fucked off & made crappy coffee, which I didn’t stay to finish. Polished off 2 glasses of wine from the night before instead. Liquid breakfast for the road. Was a sunny morning in Clontarf, thank fuck. And my journey home was like tripping on sunshine. What was to come back & haunt me later were his fingers inside me. Nightmare!
Really psyched up for a grrreat night out tonight. Meeting Messy, my oldest partner in crime. She’s 46 going on 26 but she’s had her fill of twentysomething males. She’s just never had a twentysomething man. I heart twentysomethings enough for both of us, twentysomething ladies included!
I am ready for the floor! Been dancing around all evening, stomper tunes in my ears. Andy Weatherall will be in the house at the new Bernard Shaw. Whooop!
Can’t wait to dance my tits & ass off! After the excesses of my night out with Bernard & Anto, I am feeling anything but excessive. Already buzzing off the amazing yoga session I had this afternoon. Back on track, I missed not a beat of good old Frank’s class.
Meeting Messy in Ukiyo first…hot hot hot barman alert! I hope he’s working tonight! Gonna have a long slow cocktail, pace myself. I love Ukiyo!
Oooh, it’s nearly time to go! Walked & danced the crap out of the heels of my thigh high boots the other night but my trusty cobbler did a fine job as always reheeling ’em. Decked out in a wee onzie. Sparkly blue & up to my bum. Size 10 years, haaa! I love being petite! A consignment of hand me ups for me is arriving on Monday. Clothes, glorious clothes! I never have to go shopping, the hand me ups just keep rolling in!
My bestie Sinead has a faux fur gilet for me for Christmas. Nice one! I’ll be wearing it over a denim jacket until the weather grows more clement. Meanwhile, I’m really enjoying the December chill. Today is the shortest day of the year. Winter Solstice. That & Summer Solstice are the most important dates in my calendar. Nights to party! Well, that’s my excuse.
Gonna sign off now & hit publish…time enough to fix my lipstick & sail out into the night! Party time!
Faith In The Ripple Effect 